Romney Wings – Are Mitt’s white sideburns trying to tell us something?

Romney WingsThe hair on the sides of Mitt Romney’s head are beyond distinguished grey. They are white. Almost as if painted on by a makeup artist. I’m not sure what’s in Mitt’s head these days, but the packaging is terrific. The polls for the election have been pretty consistent all summer. Most of them lean toward President Obama, whose own sideburns are greying rapidly. But this November there’s still a good chance Romney will bring those white hairs to the White House. But the look isn’t unprecedented. You can see similar examples of the white sideburns hairstyle all around you, even in nature.

The Black-Capped Chickadee The Black-Capped Chickadee is found all over Massachusetts, where Mitt Romney used to be Governor. Mitt doesn’t squawk about his record in that State. The bird is very bold around humans. They’ll even eat right out of your hand. Something Mitt should have tried at the $50,000 a plate fundraising dinner that his billionaire conservative buddies Charles and David Koch hosted for him.


Several famous humans have sported the white sideburns as well. The most cliched example would be Thurston Howell III. For those of you too young to remember, he was Hollywood’s cartoon rich man from Gilligan’s Island. He seemed out of touch with the lower class peasants he was stuck with on the island. I’m guessing he never ate out of people’s hands.

Paul "Paulie Walnuts" Gualtieri played by Tony SiricoThen there’s Paul “Paulie Walnuts” Gualtieri played by Tony Sirico on the Sopranos. You would think styling your hair after a gangster would be a bad idea for Romney. Come to think of it, Bain Capital used to take down people much in the same manner as a crime family. Think about it! Bain would load companies with debt like a lone shark and would profit when that company would fail. Bankruptcy was Bain’s preferred way of shutting down companies when they could no longer drain pension funds and make some money. The mafia would just burn down the business.

J Jonah JamisonAnother unseemly character who has Romney Wings is Spiderman’s Boss, J. Jonah Jamison. He liked to fire people too.

Here’s a great suggestion from Kate Reeves Sonnick – Cruella Deville. Romney did spend his college years in France (definitely not in Vietnam) & speaks fluent French. Perhaps Cruella inspired his hair cut while he was over there.

Now it’s your turn! If you think of any other examples of white sideburns, please leave a Tweet or a Facebook message & I’ll hunt down a photo to place on this very blog.